Isn’t it funny that we trust massage people to do things to us that would otherwise would count as assault? A stranger on the street for sure, but even if a partner did it to you in bed. One time, a massage guy (mousse? massuge?) had his forearm pressed against the back of my skull, leaning his entire body weight into my spine, the pressure slowly seperating my skull from my vertebras. Instead of wondering if he was going to pop my head off my body like a Barbie doll, I drowsily hoped he was going to add a little space between my C4 and C5. You know, loosen up some of those tendens keeping my brain stem attached to the rest of my body.

Can you imagine if someone who didn’t have a fanny pack of oils (or did) did that to you? Even with only a fraction of the force this dude was applying? You’d have crippling PTSD for the rest of your life. And if your boyfriend did that? He’d be in jail.

I almost fell asleep.